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Petty Crime To Surge in Montenegro...

Petty crime in Montenegro has rocketed as angry investors defrauded by Do Kwon scramble to be placed in a cell with him.

Chief of Montenegro Police, Dunjan N. Dragan, told Planet Crypto, “Since Do Kwon was arrested here, tourism has exploded and petty crime even more so. Skipping train fares is up 700%, peeing in fountains is up 1,000%, and it’s not just the usual British tourists doing it. One of my officers had his hat knocked off 400 times in a day…”

The Chief of Police continued. “Don’t know why… but they all seem to be Terra investors who’ve lost a lot of money… And most of them are asking if they can take knuckle-dusters and iron bars into the cells with them..?”

But one visitor lucky enough to spend a few hours in a cell with Do Kwon warned that conditions in prison are far from ideal. “There was a lot of overcrowding. So I wasn’t able to pull my arm back to slap him as hard as I would like. Plus there is maybe one toilet bucket between a hundred men. So every time I wanted to push Do Kwon’s head in it, someone was already using it. Still, I got to shout “THIEF!” at him for 48 hours straight and, all in all, it was worth getting a criminal record for. I can’t wait to come back next year.”