Kanye West, or Ye as he prefers to be called these days, has been spotted wearing a baseball cap with Satoshi Nakamoto’s name on it, prompting speculation that he might be moving into Bitcoin.
Well, why not? Kanye and Bitcoin have a lot in common. Most people don’t quite understand either of them; and both can be somewhat… unpredictable. But which is more volatile?
Planet Crypto analysed their respective volatility, using six different categories:
| KANYE | BITCOIN | |
| Likelihood of invading the stage at an award ceremony | Most famously Kanye interrupted Taylor Swift at the MTV Video Music Awards in 2009; but he’s done it several other times as well. Volatility score: 8/10 | As a non-corporeal digital asset, Bitcoin is simply unable to invade award ceremony stages. Volatility score: 1/10 |
| 2. Relationships | Despite some up and down dating history in the past year, before that he was with Kim Kardashian for nearly a decade… which is actually pretty stable of him. Volatility score: 2/10 | While you might think that as a cryptocurrency Bitcoin has no partner, it has actually been happily married to a high school geography teacher from Wells, Indiana named Simon since 2014. Volatility score: 1/10 |
| 3. Children: | Kanye has four children with Kim Kardashian. Apart from naming one of them North, making them North West, he seems to be a pretty good dad. Volatility score: 2/10 | As the first cryptocurrency, Bitcoin is technically the parent of every other cryptocurrency, thus giving it over 20,000 offspring, many of whom have gone bust, died or proven to be criminal enterprises. Volatility score: 10/10 |
| 4. Net Worth: | According to Forbes, Kanye was worth $1.3 billion last year, but this year is worth $2.6 billion. So his wealth has doubled in twelve months… and has risen every year for the past decade. Volatility score: 1/10 | BITCOIN’s market cap is currently $370 billion. Very impressive. But this time last year it was $1.2 trillion. So it’s lost nearly 70% of its value in twelve months. Which is typical of its history of fluctuating value. Volatility rating: 9/10 |
| 5. Chances of saying something unhinged and/or offensive: | KANYE: This is possibly his most well-known trait. Almost half the words he’s said in the past decade have been apologies for the other half of what he’s said. Volatility score: 9/10 | BITCOIN: Again, its non-corporeal digital nature makes it impossible for it to say anything, let alone something unhinged and/or offensive. Though rumours do persist that its originating genesis code contains the enciphered phrase ‘Mark Zuckerberg’s a pudding-faced twat’. But is that unhinged and offensive or just the truth? Volatility score: 2/10 |
| 6. Relationship With Donald Trump: | KANYE: He and The Donald have been on-again off-again friends for a while. Sometimes they hate each other; sometimes they love each other. Volatility score: 7/10 | BITCOIN: Donald Trump has always hated Bitcoin, considering it a worthless scam. It might be hate, but it is consistent. Volatility rating: 1/10 |
| TOTAL | 29 | 24 |
Totting up the scores we have:
Ye: 29
Bitcoin: 24
Making Kanye the more volatile by just over 20%. He might be the only person who could put all his money into Bitcoin and think ‘that’s a nice stable investment… at least compared to me.’
